Domestic

I love cooking, and I love cooking new things. Now that I am home and bored for this last week... I just want to cook; however, I really can't. Anyway last week I had made a super easy soup that I had been wanting to make so here it is.

Homemade Tomato Soup with Grilled Cheese Croutons

Prep time: 50 minutes | Cook time: 45 minutes | Total time: 1 hour 35 minutes

Yield: 4 servings

INGREDIENTS:

For the soup:

• 5 large plump tomatoes, halved
• 1-2 cups vegetable broth
• 3 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil, divided
• Salt and black pepper
• 1 medium yellow onion
• 1 red bell pepper, chopped
• 3 garlic cloves, minced  
• 1 teaspoon sugar
• 2 tablespoons chopped fresh parsley
• 1 sprig fresh thyme
• 10 basil leaves 

For the grilled cheese croutons:

• 2 tablespoons butter, softened
• 1 teaspoon chopped fresh basil*
• 4 slices sourdough bread
• 6 slices Colby-Jack cheese

DIRECTIONS:

Prepare the soup:

1. Preheat the panini grill to high heat.
2. Scoop out the pulp and seeds from the tomato halves into a small bowl. Place a strainer over a liquid measuring cup; pour the pulp and seeds through the strainer to collect tomato juice. Add enough vegetable broth to the measuring cup to bring the total amount of liquid to 2 cups. Set aside.
3. Drizzle the cut sides of the tomato halves with 1 tablespoon of olive oil and season with sea salt and black pepper. Adjust your grill so that it is at a slight tilt (not completely flat), with drip tray in place to collect the juices that will run off. In batches, place the tomatoes, cut side down, on the grill. Close the lid, making light contact with the tomatoes without pressing them. Grill the tomatoes for 8-10 minutes until the outer skins are wrinkly and the tomatoes are soft.
4. Slice the onion into 1/2-inch thick rounds (do not separate the rings). Drizzle the onions with 1 tablespoon of olive oil and season with salt and pepper. Place the onions on the grill. Close the lid, making light contact with the tomatoes without pressing them. Grill the onions for 4-6 minutes until they are tender.
5. Transfer the onions to a cutting board, let them cool a bit and give them a rough chop.
6. Heat the remaining 1 tablespoon of olive oil in a dutch oven or large saucepan over medium heat. Add the red bell pepper and stir for 4 to 5 minutes until it begins to soften. Add in the garlic and red pepper flakes and cook for another minute. Stir in the grilled tomatoes, onions, sugar, parsley, thyme sprig and vegetable stock mixture. Bring the soup to a boil, reduce the heat and simmer uncovered for 40 minutes.
7. Purée the soup either with an immersion blender or, in batches, in a blender or food processor. Season with salt and pepper to taste. Serve hot with grilled cheese croutons.

Prepare the grilled cheese croutons:

1. Preheat the panini grill to medium-high heat.
2. Mix the butter and herbs together in a small bowl. Spread herb butter on each slice of bread. Turn two of the bread slices over; add three slices of cheese to each slice of bread. Close each sandwich with another slice of bread, buttered side up.
3. Grill the panini for 3 to 4 minutes until the cheese is melted and bread is toasted. Transfer the panini from the grill to a cutting board. Trim the crusts from the panini and cut up each sandwich into 1-inch square pieces.

that's all I can do

I should be sleeping right now but I'm not. My whole biological clock is messed up. Sleep for this many hours, up for this many hours. I hate it. good thing I have a whole day/week of rest. People who follow me on Pinterest probably hate me because I'm constantly posting on it. Oh well. Expect that for another week, because I'm bored!

happy thursday, all. :)

the unexpected

On Monday I wasn't feeling too hot. I thought I had some major anxiety going on over school so I just shrug it off. As the night went on, around 10 o'clock I really started to notice that the pain was worsening in my upper abdomen. I finally got to sleep around 10:30  and slept for about an hour and a half and woke up in complete pain. I then knew something wasn't right and this wasn't just anxiety. Sweet, Ron called me at 2 o'clock in the A.M. and stressed to me to go to the ER. I refused because I thought I could tough it out through the morning till I could go to instacare around 11 A.M. after I had already been to work for awhile. When I got off the phone with Ron I tried going back to sleep but I just couldn't. I was in complete discomfort no matter what I did. A little bit before 5 A.M. I went up to my mom's room and told her I needed to go to the ER and it cannot wait - the pain was just too much by that point.

I got to the ER a little bit before 6 A.M. I had my make up on because I figured I would be going to work after the ER, I honestly thought I had a stomach ulcer by this point and that they would just give me some meds and I would be on my case. Well, was I completely wrong. I told the doctor my symptoms and he said that it might be several things so it is very important that I get an ultra sound done and some x-rays. As I went into my ultra sound the tech started to push on my abdomen and I honestly lost it. I just started crying because the perssure hurt so bad. As she started to search for something she couldn't find anything. I began to panic because I knew the pain I was in just wasn't right. She asked me to turn onto my left - as I did she then started to search once more... and then I heard... "oh...... there it is! - you have major gallstones." I was scared but happy at the same time. I figured they would give me a medication that would dissolve the stones and give me some pain meds and I would be on my way. As I was wheeled back into the ER my doctor came and said they were just waiting for the results. Moments later the surgeon came in and spoke the words, "you're getting gallbladder surgery today." I was so thrown back. I was not expecting that AT ALL.

About an hour and a half later I was first in line of the 5 others getting surgery. I was happy to be the first because I was so tired from being at the hospital. The overall surgery took a solid 20 minutes - but my mom began to panic because I didn't come out of recovery for an hour and a half. I wouldn't wake up. Finally, my eyes began to open as it then took me another 30 minutes to become competent. Now let me tell you... after my surgery was AWFUL. My reaction to the anesthesia was not good. In fact, it was horrible. I have never felt to nausesated in my life and the pain... oh gosh, the pain was bad.

I was then out of recovery and back with my family. The sweet nurses did their best to take care of me. I was put from the bed onto a chair, which was so painful. As I was sitting there I became overly nauseated and became to vomit (WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN!) I literally felt like my stomach was going to rip apart from the stitches. I was given 4 saltines and some pudding but I just couldn't keep anything down. My vomiting didn't happen once... but three times. Worst thing, ever. Finally around 3 P.M. I was sent home with 4 incisions to the stomach.

That is not how I had planned my Tuesday to go in the slightest bit, but I hope I start feeling better soon (good news is I get a week of work/school off). I have had such amazing friends and family and the best boyfriend out there. I cannot thank them enough for doing the things they have for me. So nice of them to bring me flowers, cards, coloring books, and making me healthy food. They have all been so wonderful and I couldn't ask for better!

vibes

As of lately I have been on this self awareness kick. I never really noticed how important it really is to be okay with who you are. I'm getting to that age where I am really beginning to find myself. Finding what I like, why I like it and why I shouldn't listen to other people's opinions. For the past 4 years I have been in a complete whirlwind - and I honestly didn't think I would get out of it anytime soon. Yeah, we will always have our time and place for struggles - but everyday doesn't have to be one. I've noticed a big change in who I am, especially in the last two years... and even more so in the last few months. I've always been an extremely positive person towards others, but never myself. I find that odd? So I really decided to put my foot down and tell myself that I AM GREAT. I am so happy with who I am and where I am going. I'm not a person who likes surprises or not knowning, but I am going to have to start liking it because that is l.i.f.e. and I am now just realizing it. I've been reading several per se quotes and even books that have helped me immensely. I am such a sucker for words. I find so much value in them, yet they're just words. It can go both ways - being helpful or hurtful but that is for you to decide. As for me I find them helpful in certain situations, even when I'm in a sitch that I don't like or 'can't handle' I tell my self.... umm... YOU CAN handle it. YOU CAN handle anything. And honestly... I can. Yeah, it may be hard and I may be sad but it's not the end.

Being okay with who you are in one of the hardest things, because I feel like you have to fake it till you make it. Actually, I know you have to fake it till you make it. But I've realized that I'm never going to be 5'8 and have super long legs. I'm not ever going to be someone with blue eyes. I'm not ever going to be the girl who is stick thin and doesn't have curves. I'm going to be that girl who is 5'4 and can rock 5 in' heels. I am going to be that girl who has honey eyes. I am going to be that girl who has curves. I am going to be that girl who can act a fool and not care about the people judging her. I am going to be that positive girl in the worst situaation. I am that girl - and I am okay with that, day by day. I've started to make little goals a week that I will do everyday. Such as, waking up every morning telling myself it'll be a good day. Easy? yes. Honestly, this last week has been such a fantastic week - super busy but so good. It's been amazing the differences it can make in your life by the little day by day changes.

I have dreams and aspirations that I want to fulfill. I want to go to culinary school in Napa Valley, California after I graduate. When I told people about it first no one supported me and I honestly felt bad about it because I felt like I had to do what everyone else thought was best for me. After feeling like that for awhile I told myself... no. This is my life, and I know what's best for me. As I started to stand up for myself, I noticed people starting to support me. So don't ever let anyone tell you what's best for YOU because only YOU know. It's YOUR life and YOU need to live it for YOU.

A special day

wowza. I haven't blogged in sometime, which is weird. I use to blog like there was no tomorrow. I guess that's the way life goes sometimes, you can't win them all. It's been almost a literal two months since I've said a peep on here, I want to say a lot has changed but that just isn't the case. I am back in the grind of work and school and... I just had a birthday. TODAY. It honestly was such an amazing day. Not that I did anything special, but I just felt special. I love that feeling. I love birthdays because it's customized to YOU. I went to work as I normally do, and as the day went on my lovely co-workers sang me happy birthday with a delightful peanut butter pie. To die for. On my lunch I went to Michaels Craft store (love that place) and picked up the cutest leopard print cupcake papers. I had planned to go home to make cupcakes for my cute friends that were coming over for dinner, but I didn't have to end up making them because my sweet mom got my favorite cupcakes from a cafe down the street. But before I had left work I was presented with a lovely surprise - FLOWERS. Now, what girl doesn't love her a fabulous bouquet of flowers? This girl sure loves them. It made my day! I have the best guy around. :) Hands down - he was also a trooper and came up for my ALL girls dinner. He met some of my friends that he hadn't met before and they just loved him, but not as much as I do. It was fun gathering around the fire on the deck at my house - full of laughter and stories. I honestly could not have asked for a better birthday.

22 is going to be a sweet ride, and I couldn't be more excited.