importance

I haven't really been writing much on here - especially since I'm constantly thinking about something. Usually I end up shrugging it off, though. First and foremost my accounting class is offically over! Can I just say hallelujah? HALLELUJAH! It's been taking over my life, literally. I've forgotten about my other classes. I'm just finishing up some loose ends in the class with assignments and one more test tomorrow and hopefully a decent grade. To reward myself I am going to head down south to Phoenix on Friday morning and I'm pretty sure I am SO ready for the 80 degree weather. Get me outta here. Hopefully catch up on some sleep while I am down there, too. Lately, I don't know what it is.. but I am tired all the time. I guess the 3-4 hours of sleep I get a night just aren't cutting it. Then I come home and take the most random naps. Like my 3 hour nap I took Saturday. I DON'T TAKE NAPS. Anywho I've have the biggest travel bug lately, I'm constantly looking for different trips to take. I've been thinking about this summer and the time I have to take off of work. I really want to take a week or so out of my summer and do a humanitarian trip to a different country.

I've been putting a lot of time into thinking about how I can get involved in different things. Take the time off of myself and put it on someone else. Mostly just get my priorities straight. I'm really wanting to stay busy with certain things and not really have time to sit and focus on my phone or the internet. (which I'm starting to get better with my phone) I've thought time and time again to just deactivate my Facebook for awhile because I literally find myself 30 comments in on a conversation that I don't care about nor even know the person. It's kind of ridiculous. Or the 1283802 posts a day about everyone wanting a boyfriend or a girlfriend - kinda can't take it anymore. Yet I can't get myself to deactivate... ah. Technology. So I figure if I start putting some service and time in other things and perhaps go to school more often to study I might be more productive. We will see how it goes.

I just think it's really important to really find what is most important to you.  No matter what it is. I've noticed a big change in myself over the last few months and I'm starting to like who I am, however, as I said before I need to kind of get my priorities in line. Not that I don't do what's right and so forth but just put emphasis on the things that are the most important to me. I've really become such a stronger person and I am proud. I've held my ground and I've finally come to the point of understanding that my values are a huge part of who I am and I'm  not chaning them. Everyone around me that really knows who I am has also seen the same change. They're constantly reminding me about how strong I truly I am. Not that anyone has really ever doubted me, but you know people tend to put a certain perception about you because of how you were for so long. I've always been strong but not so good at standing my ground. I use to be so concerned about what people would  say to me or think but I honestly can say for the most part - I don't care anymore. Let people think what they want to think, as long as you know who you are and what you stand for... you're golden.

Ah this song... I know I love it just as much as the next person, but this song really hits home for me. Not because of the killer beat, but because of the realistic lyrics it plays in my life. It's amazing. Amazing.

perfect

I've been non stop busy. It's good and tiring. But I enjoy it. It keeps me occupied and let's me worry about necessary things rather than unnecessary things. Ever since I've been back from the big city I've been downing homework like it's nobody's business. My hybrid class is sure kicking my butt... I'm pretty sure accounting shouldn't be an accelerated class - but mine is. Missing that week kind of killed me, but.... IT WAS SO WORTH IT.

I honestly could not have asked for a better trip in NYC with my long time friend since birth, Madi. We just share so much in common and are such easy going people, it made it amazing. We can be completely 100% ourselves with each other - I love it. Granted our days were pretty much go, go, go because we didn't want to miss a thing. Let's just says we got a little delirious... Our sleeping was almost non existent and our feet thanked us when we got home but it was absolutley perfect. We did the basic tourist sites and strolled the streets, but my favorite was walking through Central Park with no place to be. It was amazing to be somewhere so busy yet almost feel as if you were in a completely different state. The people were fanstatic, everyone had warned me that the people were rude and stuck up - I was surely expecting that; however, not one person was rude. Everyone was so great. We met several people from there and all of the world which made our trip that much more fun. Just getting out and doing something completely out of both of our comfort zones made us realize how much we are missing. You can definitely say that neither of us wanted to come home, unfortunately we couldn't afford living there. Sad. I can't wait to see where our next choice of travel takes us. We're making this a habit... if you can't tell.

Being back home is nice though. Missing a few certain people and wanting to see a few certain people made coming home much easier. It's always a little exciting seeing people you want to see or miss. It honestly just makes me happy. I have such great people in my life, I couldn't ask for anything better. These last couple of months have been a real growing experience for me. I've been noticing little subtle changes about myself... I'm growing into someone I never thought I'd be, but I'm loving it. I'm being more open and honest to myself. I'm not holding back certain feelings and expressing my thoughts. If I like how I feel in the moment then why would I mess that up with over analyzation? I'm not anymore. I'm loving who I am and what I am capable of being. I'm not afraid. If I fail I fail. It's okay. If I succeed I succeed. That's okay too. I'll take what I can and roll with it.

As we know.. I always have to have a song with every blog post. This song has nothing to do with my post. But it's a repeat song for me (which means I'm obsessed with it). It's so incredibly beautiful.

I surrender who I’ve been for who you are,
For nothing makes me stronger than your fragile heart.
If I had only felt how it feels to be yours,
Well, I would have known what I’ve been living for all along.
What I’ve been living for